Midwife and Health Visitor visited and Midwife handed over to Health Visitor. My actual Health Visitor is off sick and the one covering her is on leave so there will be someone else who visits next week. She came loaded with leaflets and gave a brief run down of what each contained. I wondered what happened to mothers who had difficulty reading or for whom English was not their first language….. She seemed obsessed with contraception!! I spent the afternoon wading through the leaflets that she gave me, and then felt guilty that I had not spent enough time with Jamie but had allowed myself to get snowed under in ‘paperwork’.
Trying to tidy up but feel guilty about leaving Jamie. Dad is coping very well – apart from the lack of sleep – and is loving the skin to skin. I suppose I am still worried about getting too close to Jamie in case anything happens – which it won’t. I know this all stems from my Dads death and is completely irrational but..…just looking at Jamie I am overcome with such love and it creates such fear. As Dad says we need to live for the moment and appreciate the time we have NOW and anyway NOTHING IS GOING TO HAPPEN. I worried all the way through the pregnancy and it all went well and Jamie is a perfect baby.
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