One of the first things people ask you seems to be ‘Have you thought of any names yet?’
Have I thought of any names? Yes and they are constantly changing as I find reasons for NOT naming a child that name. Each name has to be have mulled over in your mind (and out loud when no one is about) for a while in order for the scenarios to appear to you. And then you remember people you know (and their children), people from school, and even sometimes peoples pets names….
I currently have 8 names on the short list and I feel sorry for those people who don't want to find out the sex of their baby prior as they have twice the job!! But it is a major responsibility. Your child will have that name for the rest of its life!! As David Narter writes in: Don’t Name your Baby: What’s wrong with every name in this book (Cumberland House, Nashville (2001)) "The name you give your baby will be so much of a part of that child that, years from now, he/she will find much of their personality defined by the name." No pressure then!
In our family there is a bit of a tradition for names beginning with J. My mother is one of 3 girls - all beginning with J, then there is me and my cousin Jonathan. His brother - had he been a girl - was to be called Jemima. He was named Anthony instead. A story that ran in December last year (www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/article-1098292/Woman-gives-birth-18th-child--names-begin-letter-J.html) was 'Woman gives birth to her 18th child... and all their names begin with letter 'J' ' The baby was named Jordyn-Grace Makiya Duggar. Their oldest child, Joshua, is 20. The other Duggar children in between Joshua and Jordyn-Grace, are Jana, 18; John-David, 18; Jill, 17; Jessa, 16; Jinger, 14; Joseph, 13; Josiah, 12; Joy-Anna, 11; Jeremiah, 9; Jedidiah, 9; Jason, 8; James, 7; Justin, 6; Jackson, 4; Johannah, 3; and Jennifer, 1.
Highly recommended is The Brilliant Book of Baby Names: What’s Best, What’s Hot & What’s Not by Pamela Redmoind Satran & Linda Rosenkrantz, Collins (2007) and the site www.babynames.co.uk/popular_baby_names.htm
Monday, 23 March 2009
Saturday, 21 March 2009
Its good to talk
After the trauma of Mondays Parent Craft Class and an episode of breathlessness in the week I was tempted to ring the Midwife and ask if there were any counselling services for mothers to be with regards to panic and depression. However, I am lucky enough to have a number of good friends who have helped alleviate my fears. I am still obsessed with checking for baby's movements but I know I am not the only one!!
Thursday I had a good chat with my gym buddy and then Thursday night I met Sarah (Blog Baby 3). Also on Thursday though I saw someone who said 'you seem to have been pregnant for ages'. Tell me about it!! Friday morning I saw another good friend who has 2 older children but works with the community Health Visitors and then last night we went to a party where most of the couples there had children.
It seems everyone has an incidence (or 2 or 3) of panicking about baby's movements and rushes up to the hospital. And almost all mothers worry about whether or not their baby will be 'normal'. Its all natural!! And I feel lucky to have friends around me who understand...
Thursday I had a good chat with my gym buddy and then Thursday night I met Sarah (Blog Baby 3). Also on Thursday though I saw someone who said 'you seem to have been pregnant for ages'. Tell me about it!! Friday morning I saw another good friend who has 2 older children but works with the community Health Visitors and then last night we went to a party where most of the couples there had children.
It seems everyone has an incidence (or 2 or 3) of panicking about baby's movements and rushes up to the hospital. And almost all mothers worry about whether or not their baby will be 'normal'. Its all natural!! And I feel lucky to have friends around me who understand...
Wednesday, 18 March 2009
Parent Craft Class: Week Three
Final week and I hardly slept a wink afterwards! So many issues and things to think about. We discussed Caesarean sections and ‘going home’ after the birth. We also watched a film about how a child develops and how they learn to become ‘human’ i.e. the connections they make to objects and people as they grow.
Julie was very good and kept asking if we had any questions (which I seemed to have loads) and near the end she asked what we were most worried about. I said it was the baby coming out abnormal. Matt and Nicole obviously had the same worries as me. Talking to them I thought initially it was because they were my age but then Nicole said she was only 34. It was only once I got back that I realised it was because it was a surprise pregnancy. The girl with twins said she was 38. It just shows I am terrible at guessing peoples ages. I suppose this is because I compare everyone I meet to myself and I still don’t see myself as the 40 year old that looks back at me in the mirror.
After the class, I dreamt that I had a baby boy, but that his face was of a dolls and I wanted to call him ‘Poppy’. Looking down he was a boy but the face seemed very strange. I have no idea what this could mean…..but it makes a change from the ‘unprepared’ dreams I have been having.
Julie was very good and kept asking if we had any questions (which I seemed to have loads) and near the end she asked what we were most worried about. I said it was the baby coming out abnormal. Matt and Nicole obviously had the same worries as me. Talking to them I thought initially it was because they were my age but then Nicole said she was only 34. It was only once I got back that I realised it was because it was a surprise pregnancy. The girl with twins said she was 38. It just shows I am terrible at guessing peoples ages. I suppose this is because I compare everyone I meet to myself and I still don’t see myself as the 40 year old that looks back at me in the mirror.
After the class, I dreamt that I had a baby boy, but that his face was of a dolls and I wanted to call him ‘Poppy’. Looking down he was a boy but the face seemed very strange. I have no idea what this could mean…..but it makes a change from the ‘unprepared’ dreams I have been having.
Friday, 13 March 2009
32 Weeks.....
....and a trip to the Midwife. Finally got my Health in Pregnancy Grant form to complete. My usual Midwife was on hols so it was someone else but she was still nice and friendly. Took blood pressure and measured my belly - still measuring a week more than I am (33weeks). Asked me about any swelling and afterwards I noticed she had noted Oedema in my notes; which results from the extra blood you've acquired during your pregnancy. What happens is, your growing uterus puts pressure on your pelvic veins and your vena cava (a large vein on the right side of your body that receives blood from your lower limbs). That slows down circulation and causes blood to pool. Pressure from the trapped blood forces water down into the tissues of your feet and ankles. That water is fluid that would normally be in your body but is simply displaced. Sometimes pregnant women also retain excess water, which adds to the swelling. Apparently salty foods makes it worse - bang goes those Pringles.... www.babycentre.co.uk/pregnancy/antenatalhealth/physicalhealth/swollenhandsandfeet/
Searched the net on what happens in week 32 and found:
Your baby now weighs approximately 3.75 pounds/ 1.7 kilograms and is about 17 inches/ 42 centimetres long from head to toe. If your baby is a boy, his testicles should be descending from his abdomen into his scrotum. Sometimes however, one or both testicles won't move into position until after birth. In two-thirds of all baby boys who have undescended testicles at birth, the condition corrects itself by the boy's first birthday.
At the beginning of the third trimester, as the baby grows larger, he presses on your internal organs and it may lead to the problems such as breathlessness, heartburn etc but once the baby's head drops into pelvis most of these problems will get reduced. On the other hand, your bladder will be under more pressure, so you may need to urinate even more frequently. Back aches, muscle cramps, and swelling of the hands and feet are quite common.
You're probably gaining around 450g /1 lb a week now, and roughly half of that goes straight to your baby. In fact, he gains a third to half of his birth weight during the next seven weeks, fattening up for survival outside the womb. Thanks to these fatty deposits, his skin is getting plumper and healthier looking.
During the seventh month, the baby is growing and gaining weight, so there is less space in your uterus and the aminotic fluid will start diminishing. This may affect the movement of the fetus and hence you might not feel the movement and kicks as much as you felt during the second trimester. You may want to check on your baby's movements from time to time — especially if you think you've noticed decreased activity. If you count fewer than 10 movements in two hours, contact your health care provider.
It is during this last three months that a fetus grows most. During this time the baby will respond actively to the sound and touch. You can feel your baby's arms and legs if you watch your abdomen. His skin becomes thicker but smoother and will be covered with a white coating called vernix'. This protects your baby's skin as he floats in the amniotic fluid, preventing his skin becoming prune-like during his 9-month bath. Babies are actually asleep for most of their time in the womb. Baby can open his eyes and used to suck his thumb and cry.
Searched the net on what happens in week 32 and found:
Your baby now weighs approximately 3.75 pounds/ 1.7 kilograms and is about 17 inches/ 42 centimetres long from head to toe. If your baby is a boy, his testicles should be descending from his abdomen into his scrotum. Sometimes however, one or both testicles won't move into position until after birth. In two-thirds of all baby boys who have undescended testicles at birth, the condition corrects itself by the boy's first birthday.
At the beginning of the third trimester, as the baby grows larger, he presses on your internal organs and it may lead to the problems such as breathlessness, heartburn etc but once the baby's head drops into pelvis most of these problems will get reduced. On the other hand, your bladder will be under more pressure, so you may need to urinate even more frequently. Back aches, muscle cramps, and swelling of the hands and feet are quite common.
You're probably gaining around 450g /1 lb a week now, and roughly half of that goes straight to your baby. In fact, he gains a third to half of his birth weight during the next seven weeks, fattening up for survival outside the womb. Thanks to these fatty deposits, his skin is getting plumper and healthier looking.
During the seventh month, the baby is growing and gaining weight, so there is less space in your uterus and the aminotic fluid will start diminishing. This may affect the movement of the fetus and hence you might not feel the movement and kicks as much as you felt during the second trimester. You may want to check on your baby's movements from time to time — especially if you think you've noticed decreased activity. If you count fewer than 10 movements in two hours, contact your health care provider.
It is during this last three months that a fetus grows most. During this time the baby will respond actively to the sound and touch. You can feel your baby's arms and legs if you watch your abdomen. His skin becomes thicker but smoother and will be covered with a white coating called vernix'. This protects your baby's skin as he floats in the amniotic fluid, preventing his skin becoming prune-like during his 9-month bath. Babies are actually asleep for most of their time in the womb. Baby can open his eyes and used to suck his thumb and cry.
Tuesday, 10 March 2009
Parent Craft Class: Week Two
Made the Bull have the day off work today so that he didn’t miss tonight’s Parent Craft Class. This meant we had the day to go shopping and ended up spending approx £140 on baby related goods from Boots and Mothercare – the most expensive purchase being a new mattress for the cot that we had been given. We found this purchase rather complicated as we weren’t sure what mattress and / or bedding we needed / wanted, but a nice lady from Mothercare sorted us out. We are currently going for a Winnie the Pooh theme…
Treated ourselves with lunch in the pub but then I had to come home for a rest!! The major drawback today was that by the time we got into town I needed to go to the toilet which meant having to use the public ones in the bus station – not very nice at all!!
In the end we were glad we made the effort to go to the PCC. All the other couples made a return visit – including coatboy – and everyone was a lot more chatty and less nervous this week. The evening focused on the actual labour and giving birth and I honestly came away feeling a lot calmer about the whole ‘event’. I have more of an idea about the stages of labour and the pain relief that may be required. Must remember to ask for the Pethidine early on – as this will calm me if I get panicky. Also need to remember other relaxation techniques prior to full labour – massage, water, keeping mobile, music etc. especially my breathing (Slowly and Deeply). Need to also investigate the use of a Tens machine as this might also help with my back ache. Currently I am trying to ease the pain with the help of a very attractive support belt and support knickers!! (Forgot to mention that I did go to the Drs with regards to my back but she wasn't much help at all and suggested the pain was because of my age).
Have I mentioned that people have started knitting for us? Very impressive pair of socks / booties (white with a blue trim) and a hat from Nanna. Can't get over how impressed I am with them - especially as she will be 89 this year!!
Treated ourselves with lunch in the pub but then I had to come home for a rest!! The major drawback today was that by the time we got into town I needed to go to the toilet which meant having to use the public ones in the bus station – not very nice at all!!
In the end we were glad we made the effort to go to the PCC. All the other couples made a return visit – including coatboy – and everyone was a lot more chatty and less nervous this week. The evening focused on the actual labour and giving birth and I honestly came away feeling a lot calmer about the whole ‘event’. I have more of an idea about the stages of labour and the pain relief that may be required. Must remember to ask for the Pethidine early on – as this will calm me if I get panicky. Also need to remember other relaxation techniques prior to full labour – massage, water, keeping mobile, music etc. especially my breathing (Slowly and Deeply). Need to also investigate the use of a Tens machine as this might also help with my back ache. Currently I am trying to ease the pain with the help of a very attractive support belt and support knickers!! (Forgot to mention that I did go to the Drs with regards to my back but she wasn't much help at all and suggested the pain was because of my age).
Have I mentioned that people have started knitting for us? Very impressive pair of socks / booties (white with a blue trim) and a hat from Nanna. Can't get over how impressed I am with them - especially as she will be 89 this year!!
Saturday, 7 March 2009
Trip to the Hospital
Got a little panicky on Thursday and then again Friday as I thought baby was moving less than he had been. He was certainly still moving but I thought it was less noticeable. Friday night about 4.30pm I rang the 24hr Assessment Unit at the hospital for some reassurance, but instead of saying 'Its Normal', the Midwife told me to come in about 8pm. Those few hours were torment - especially as the Bull should have been meeting his friends for a few drinks at 5pm and then wetting the babies head (Ella's) at 7.30pm. We arrived just after 7.45pm to be told there may be a wait as other mother's had come in. Luckily, we were seen just after 8.15pm. We were taken to a side room and hooked up to a monitor measuring baby's heartbeat and something else - contractions? I got a bit worried watching the figures change so rapidly; especially as the Midwife said his heartbeat should be a max of 165 and it went higher, but she later explained that this was when he moved. She also made me push a button every time I felt him, and it seemed that he moved quite a bit; especially when we were talking!
The Midwife let us go after about 45mins; saying all was well. Notes say: 'Accelerations evident, No Decelerations, Good Variability'. She said that the perceived lack of movement was probably due to my leaving work and resting due to my back. She said if I felt worried again I was to go up straight away, but that having a bath or sitting quiet for half an hour would probably ensure we could feel him. She also said that my side pain was probably muscle pain.
Got home and felt relieved but also a bit panicky. Have now begun to get panicky about the fact I might panic in the next few months!! But I know that this can be dealt with by eating healthily, exercising, resting and practicing deep breathing, so its time to really start looking after myself (and baby!). No more junk food and I need to get out in the fresh air more.
The Midwife let us go after about 45mins; saying all was well. Notes say: 'Accelerations evident, No Decelerations, Good Variability'. She said that the perceived lack of movement was probably due to my leaving work and resting due to my back. She said if I felt worried again I was to go up straight away, but that having a bath or sitting quiet for half an hour would probably ensure we could feel him. She also said that my side pain was probably muscle pain.
Got home and felt relieved but also a bit panicky. Have now begun to get panicky about the fact I might panic in the next few months!! But I know that this can be dealt with by eating healthily, exercising, resting and practicing deep breathing, so its time to really start looking after myself (and baby!). No more junk food and I need to get out in the fresh air more.
Wednesday, 4 March 2009
Parent Craft Class: Week One
Repeat after me; 'Breast is Best, Breast is Best, Breast is Best'.....Over and over again!!
We were both nervous -yes, I made The Bull come to - but I don't think we were the worst. There were 6 couples altogether and the midwife running the course (with help from a Parenting Support Worker) made us all go around and introduce ourselves. I didn't look the oldest. In fact, there were two girls (and their partners) who I thought were about my age, so that made me feel better. (Although I may have been the biggest!!) I knew The Bull hated all the 'group work' but there was another partner who sat in his coat all night and did not speak. His wife/girlfriend ended up sat next to me and she was very nice. When she introduced them she informed us they were having twin girls. Between the group the sex was split equally (3 boys, 3 girls) with only one couple not knowing what they were having. Due dates ranged from between April to July (twins).
I can't say I learnt an awful lot but I did learn some things about Breast feeding I had been unaware of. I didn't realise you could freeze breast milk... The only drawback was I am still confused with regards to bottle feeding and equipment required. There was no discussion and I felt that any question was deflected back to 'Breast is Best'.
I found the whole evening quite frightening. There I was sat with 5 other pregnant ladies; looking at the size of their bumps and talking about breast feeding - very scary. It has all become very real all of a sudden!!
We were both nervous -yes, I made The Bull come to - but I don't think we were the worst. There were 6 couples altogether and the midwife running the course (with help from a Parenting Support Worker) made us all go around and introduce ourselves. I didn't look the oldest. In fact, there were two girls (and their partners) who I thought were about my age, so that made me feel better. (Although I may have been the biggest!!) I knew The Bull hated all the 'group work' but there was another partner who sat in his coat all night and did not speak. His wife/girlfriend ended up sat next to me and she was very nice. When she introduced them she informed us they were having twin girls. Between the group the sex was split equally (3 boys, 3 girls) with only one couple not knowing what they were having. Due dates ranged from between April to July (twins).
I can't say I learnt an awful lot but I did learn some things about Breast feeding I had been unaware of. I didn't realise you could freeze breast milk... The only drawback was I am still confused with regards to bottle feeding and equipment required. There was no discussion and I felt that any question was deflected back to 'Breast is Best'.
I found the whole evening quite frightening. There I was sat with 5 other pregnant ladies; looking at the size of their bumps and talking about breast feeding - very scary. It has all become very real all of a sudden!!
Sunday, 1 March 2009
I have officially started Maternity Leave....
.....still got a bit of a bad back and to add to this I had terrible indigestion after going out for my last meal with the team on Friday. Sad to say goodbye but I will at least try to keep in touch and have sent an email thanking them all for my voucher and pressies and included my email address. I will miss the people but I don't think my body could have carried on much longer...
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